Shaken Not Stirred – A Martini 101 or How To Order A Martini

Shaken not stirred. That’s how we like our martinis. It’s Saturday evening here in Siem Reap and Lara and I are starting to think about pre-dinner cocktails. One of our favourite cocktails here is a martini at one of our favourite bars, Miss Wong. But how to order a martini correctly? Here’s our Martini 101 – a guide to how to order a martini. And, no, James Bond did not get it wrong! Shaken or stirred is a personal preference. I’ll explain why.

When Lara and I were travel writers just starting to review bars and restaurants many years ago, we realised we needed yardsticks. If we were reviewing a hotel’s breakfast, the dish by which we’d compare it to other hotel breakfasts became Eggs Benedict. Because while making Eggs Benedict isn’t rocket science, there are many things that hotels get wrong.

For reviewing bars and cocktails I decided I needed a cocktail by which to judge whether the bar had a bartender who were up to scratch. I decided on the martini. In hindsight, a martini was a great idea for assessing a bar, but a bad idea if we had to assess four bars in a night – sometimes two bars before dinner and sometimes two after dinner. The results were as predictable as they were messy.

We recently caught up with friends at a hotel bar. I’d been to the bar before and ordered my usual drink but they had failed miserably. The problem was, on that particular night, I had just described to our friend who was in charge of the hotel’s public relations that the martini was the drink by which I judged bars.

I had explained to her that I could tell whether a bar was serious about what it was serving, or whether it was just taking advantage of tired tourists too exhausted to take a tuk tuk somewhere better, by the way it made its martinis. She was a little embarrassed and professed that the bar was due for a makeover.

So here’s how I judge whether the bar knows how to make the classic cocktail, the martini. You could also think of this as a Martini 101 or a guide to how to order a martini.

Shaken Not Stirred – A Martini 101 or How To Order A Martini

Our guide to how to order a martini – our Martini 101.

There should always be questions when ordering a martini

When we’re visiting a bar for the first time, Lara will order a creative cocktail off the drinks menu that’s unique to that bar, a cocktail that’s more elaborate, exotic or local to test the bar’s creativity, while I stick to the martini to ensure the bar staff know how to mix classic cocktails.

When the bartender or waiter ask what I want, I just say “a martini, thanks” and wait for the questions. There should always be questions. If you’re not asked the following questions then use this as a guide to order the kind of martini you like – whether shaken or stirred.

Gin or Vodka?

The first question a decent bartender should ask after you order a martini, of course, should be whether you want gin or vodka. This is straightforward. If they don’t ask, we have a problem.

Although a few years ago at The Ritz in Paris, where we interviewed Colin Field, the world’s greatest bartender according to Forbes magazine, among others, Colin informed us dryly “If the martini is vodka-based, it’s a vodkatini.” It’s not a classic martini.

What Kind of Gin?

When ordering a classic martini, the next question a good bar person should ask is what kind of gin you want. I’m happy when the bar staff asks if I want Tanqueray (and if they do, it will be Tanqueray No. 10) or Bombay Sapphire, Lara’s all-time favourite gin, or the wonderfully botanical Hendrick’s.

Sure they’re all premium spirits, but considering that the only other alcohol is a lesser percentage of dry white vermouth, it’s worth the extra bucks.

Although if a bottle of Hendrick’s is on the shelf in front of me, I might be tempted to go for a G&T just so I can get the full bouquet of that beautiful gin. On a night off from reviewing bars, of course…

Shaken or stirred?

It was James Bond who said he preferred his martinis shaken not stirred, and while a shaken martini is colder – shaking gets the martini colder much quicker – it may weaken the cocktail and make it cloudy for a short time. There is also a difference in taste.

But remember: regardless of whether you want your martini shaken or stirred (neither is wrong, just personal preference), a martini needs to be really cold – probably the most important factor in this martini 101 lesson.

I prefer my martini shaken because I want my martinis super cold and I generally don’t think most bartenders know how to achieve that by stirring the martini.

There is some talk that the difference is at the molecular level, but I’m not a scientist, I just want a viscous, really cold, alcoholic beverage.

For those who prefer their martinis stirred – a martini-lover on Twitter insisted a martini must be stirred and that if a bartender can’t stir a martini then they are not a good bartender – it’s worth noting that it takes only 15 seconds of shaking to get the martini down to around -7˚C. The optimum coldness for a martini is between -5˚C and -10˚C.

Of course there are many variables when it comes to stirring a cocktail, such as the temperature of the glass, the size of the glass, the type of ice, and how vigorously the drink is stirred. However, scientific tests have shown that it takes about one minute 45 seconds of fast stirring for the drink to to reach -3°C. Or even longer.

If you can find a bar with a Kold-Draft ice machine and a bartender who can knock 30 seconds off the time to stir a martini, make it your local. I’d make it mine too, only I’m testing cocktails around the world. But the bottom line on the shaken or stirred martini debate is that it’s your choice.

A dry martini?

A super dry martini is a mix of 15-to-1 between gin and vermouth (yes, that’s why you need a great gin!) but I find that most martinis at bars these days are made to a 3-to-1 mix. Personally, I like my martinis dryish, usually around 8-to-1, rather than dry. You need to experiment to figure out what you prefer – preferably at home – but do it over a number of cocktail nights.

Olives or a twist?

Either an olive garnish or twist of lemon is fine, but for me it depends on the type of gin. While Hendrick’s gin, packed full of flavour and aromatics, can handle an olive or two, my personal opinion is that most martinis are better with a twist of lemon so that the flavour of the gin shines through – but, again, the martini needs to be really cold for olives to work, too.

Do you want it dirty?

If you’ve requested olives, the question that follows should be whether you want a dirty martini (or just olive garnish). A ‘dirty’ martini is with olives and some olive brine. I tend to shy away from a dirty martini, unless I know the bar and the bartender.

There is nothing worse than brine from a jar of olives that’s been sitting in a refrigerator for months, as Lara recently discovered at a Siem Reap bar that shall remain nameless. That’s a filthy martini.

If you’re new to martinis, you’re not a martini fan, or you’re not even a cocktail lover, I expect you might also have a few questions for me. Feel free to ask in the comments below.

What makes a martini special?

A martini makes everything right in the world, although Lara would say the same about a negroni – both are drinks for adults.

But you know, when you’ve had one of those days when you hate your boss, you hate your life, or you’re just wondering what it all means?

A martini might not provide all the answers, but by the second martini it will certainly make you loose enough to not care for a few hours. Just don’t go for a third…

Why are two martinis enough?

A martini is alcohol on alcohol with no respite. A martini is a heady cocktail. A martini before dinner and one after is optimal for most people – unless you require one for medicinal purposes.

How can bartenders get such a simple cocktail so wrong?

You would not believe how easy it is to go wrong with a martini. It’s either not cold enough. There’s way too much vermouth when you asked for it dry. The bartender defaults to using vodka instead of gin. Or uses cocktail olives older than me – and less, well, brined. Or they use the wrong glass – there’s a reason it’s called a martini glass. The list goes on.

The worst martini I ever had was from a barman at an upscale restaurant in Diani Beach, Kenya. He literally poured me a glass of Extra Dry Martini Vermouth. Maybe it was lost in translation, but at least it wasn’t a full glass of Martini Rosso. Apparently people drink this on its own. In public ;)

According to a bartender on Twitter, who might have thought we were American, if you order a martini in Europe they’ll serve you a glass of Martini Vermouth without hesitation… that’s never been our experience in decades of travelling in Europe, and we must have ordered martinis in over 70 countries around the world by now. Someone needs a Martini 101!

Maybe I’ve just been very lucky or I look like I need a martini not a shot from a bottle of Martini Vermouth, which no-one should drink on its own. If you’re concerned European bartenders might get your order wrong, order a ‘martini cocktail’.

While the thought of downing Martini Vermouth on its own gives me the shivers, in Barcelona, vermouth drinks are making a comeback, but a decent Vermouth tastes very different to Martini Vermouth on the rocks.

On our return to that posh hotel bar here in Siem Reap last week, I noticed a change. I ordered a martini and the bartender used Tanqueray. And they made the cocktail table-side. Did my feedback have some effect? I like to think so. Cheers.

Is there anything we’ve left out of our Martini 101? Feel free to leave your thoughts in the comments below.

By the way, one of our favourite bars in Southeast Asia that does a grown-up’s martini is Miss Wong in Siem Reap, pictured above. The martini cocktail in the foreground with rose petals on top is Lara’s favourite cocktail at Miss Wong, the Rose and Lemongrass Martini. And she has been known to have more than a couple…